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Friday, June 08, 2007

"Do You Have Children??"


Trying To Conceive Over 40, Pregnancy Over 40, Dealing With The Intrusive Questions

I heard an old saying once:

When you're in your 20's, you care what everyone thinks
When you're in your 30's, you don't care what anyone thinks
When you're in your 40's, you realize nobody was thinking about you anyway!
My site: www.getpregnantover40.com
I found this to be true now that I'm well into my 40's. Why do I bring it up here? When you're trying to have a baby and you're not succeeding, it seems like everyone else out there blinks their eyes and presto! They're pregnant. You're left feeling like a failure and some kind of social misfit who can't peform the most basic of all human functions. You dread the "Do you have children?" question and you feel like everyone is trying to figure out if you're selfish for not having kids or if you should be pitied because you can't have any. In hindsight, I must say that most people out there aren't half as interested in your life as you think they are. I'm not saying that you aren't an interesting person, but honestly, most people are so wrapped up in their own day to day drama they don't have the time to delve into your reproductive physiology.

So the next time you fall into the trap of wondering what everyone is thinking about you, remember that everyone has their challenges in life, and they don't always share them with others. You can't control what others think, so why even spend time worrying about it? Almost without exception, whenever I have been envious of someone else's life, I later find out about some challenge they've gone through (or are going through) that makes my life seem like a walk in the park. Count your blessings - there's more on the way!

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Pregnancy Over 40, Never Finding Mr. Right

Trying To Conceive Over 40...With The Right Man

Many women who are trying to conceive over 40 didn't mean to wait that long, they just never found Mr. Right until later in life.
My site: www.getpregnantover40.com
 I know that was true for me. I frequently write about couples who are struggling with infertility, but there's a whole other segment of the population single without kids. Some of these people choose to be single and don't want children, others would like to have a family but haven't found someone they want to settle down with. Here is an article about life without children written by one of those people:

Life without children

Jan Masters always thought she'd become a mother. Now 43, with no 'baby on board', she speaks candidly of expectations, loss and the deceptions of serial monogamy (observer.guardian.co.uk)


From the article:

Sure, at 43, I have the home, and there's often been a man in the picture, but as for children, there are none. Not because I ever had to face learning I was infertile. Neither did I postpone pregnancy to concentrate on a career, only to thud back down to earth on finding the egg-timer had run dry. It's just that while navigating my way through the thoroughly modern maze of serial monogamy, with all its deceptive bends and dead ends, I never reached the let's-make-babies stage with anyone. Not even when I was married - a brief, precarious union in which it seemed unwise to use parenthood as Polyfilla..

Friday, June 01, 2007

Beautiful Video About One Couple's Journey Through Infertility


Trying To Conceive Over 40, Infertility Video

I found this link to a video which beautifully puts into words and pictures how infertility affects couples.
My site: www.getpregnantover40.com
 I'll worn you, it's very emotionally charged and you will feel somewhat tearful watching it. But it does help to know that you are not the only one feeling devastated by wanting something that seems so unattainable (at least for now). This would be a great video to share with others who may not understand your struggle.

Empty Arms (www.tearsandhope.com)

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